4 ❀ 花吐き病

[konnosuke]

H A N A H A K I ✿

Hanahaki is a fictional disease in which the victim coughs up flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. It ends when the beloved returns their feelings (romantic love only; strong friendship is not enough), or when the victim dies. It can be cured through surgical removal, but when the infection is removed, the victim's romantic feelings for their love also disappear.

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[tsukijiji]

[What can he do... He knows the story. There is nothing that will make it stop unless whoever Kunihiro loves returns his affections.

He ignores the little pang in his chest as he thinks that. It doesn't matter who it is. All that matters is that Kunihiro gets better, and that he is happy with that person.]

Kunihiro... can you tell them?

[replicatedform]

[That question. One of the hardest in his life, because of what he thought of his situation. What he thought Mikazuki might think. He take a step backward from Mikazuki, shaking his head.]

There's... no need. [He's afraid. What if Mikazuki likes someone else? He's not the only sword in his life. There's others with a more significant connection to Mikazuki Munechika, after all. The pain in his chest grow again at those thoughts, and his breathing get heavier again.] I don't think he...

["... feel the same." But Yamanbagiri Kunihiro haven't even approach Mikazuki about this. His emotional side is conflicting and overwhelming with his logical side. Ah, the urge to run away right now is very, very strong.]

[tsukijiji]

But if you don't tell them, you will never know for sure.

[And then you will either choke on the flowers and die, or they will need to be cut out and everything that makes you so beautiful and... you, will disappear. And he can't let that happen.]

Please, Kunihiro. We can't lose you this.

["I can't lose you like this."]

[replicatedform]

Even if I tell them, I don't think... they would feel... feel the same.

[And if he's rejected, gently or not, he doesn't know how that would affect him.

At this point, hearing Mikazuki call him "Kunihiro" hurts. Yes, it made him happy because it's his name. But this disease...

Backing away from Mikazuki, he cover his mouth again when he starts to cough up the flowers.]

[tsukijiji]

... Kunihiro!

[More flowers are coming out and he just... doesn't know what to do. Honestly, he could cry right now, and his eyes are definitely shining a little too bright.

And now Kunihiro is backing away from him and he just ... doesn't follow. He was starting to hold out his hand but then it just hands in the air, and he finally pulls it back towards himself.

What else can he do?]

[replicatedform]

[Scared and conflicted, Yamanbagiri turns around and left the room. The petals of gardenia are evidence of his presence, forming a faint, scattered trail where he goes.

Gardenia. Secret love.

... After that, Yamanbagiri Kunihiro kept his distance. But one day, he's been removed from active duty. Yagen reported to the Saniwa and advised to keep Yamanbagiri off the field. As far as everyone knows, Yamanbagiri earned his rest.

Naturally, this bothered him. But Yamanbagiri logically understand why and can't bring himself to disobey the Saniwa. And in that time, allow his thoughts to run in his mind. About Mikazuki, about the flowers, his duty, about Mikazuki...

After another coughing fit, he gaze at the petals in his hand. And think... maybe he should say something. And bear with it. Whatever the results, he did run away from Mikazuki last time.

He didn't want others to see him coughing even by chance. So he asked Yamabushi to deliver a message to Mikazuki.

(At this point, he suspected his brothers know about his condition.)

Yamabushi looked at him with understanding, before he nodded and went off to find Mikazuki. To tell him that his brother wish to talk to him.]

[tsukijiji]

[He saw the petals, recognized the flowers of course. But after Kunihiro all but runs out on him, he... pulls back a little. It's no use hounding him. Kunihiro can be stubborn, and this is hurting him, clearly.

But then he gets taken off duty a clear sign that things are getting worse. Kunihiro's presence becomes more elusive as he spends most of his time resting. It's a rare day where you can catch a glimpse of him, and Mikazuki devours him with his eyes whenever he does since he doesn't dare go any closer after what happened.

He's had several conversations with the other Kunihiro brothers. At first he thought those were by chance and innocuous, but they keep happening, and somehow he has a feeling this is not just about them being worried for their brother. They keep seeking him out specifically. And he wants to hope... but he doesn't dare. Kunihiro's health must be the primary concern. His own heart can take the blow if it means Kunihiro will be alright.

But then, Yamabushi brings the request, and he is both eager and still a little fearful which makes him dawdle just a little and then hesitate outside of Kunihiro's door before he calls out.]

... Kunihiro? Yamabushi said you wanted to see me?

[replicatedform]

[He hates this. If it's an injury or any other sickness, he'd bear with it. Those are easy to understand, and easy for him to accept and recover from. But not Hanahaki.

At hearing Mikazuki's voice, he's silent for a moment. Before his cough breaks it, after his heart beats painfully.]

... Y-Yeah... I do. [He wants to Mikazuki. He also need to see him, but he still want to. After a moment, he speaks again.] Come in.

[Yamanbagiri's room have flower petals here and there, particularly around where his futon would get laid out and his desk. The small bin already have some petals in them, as he didn't want to make more work for Horikawa to clean up.

As for Yamanbagiri himself, he's sitting at the desk. He's not even doing anything, and he have no work. But it's a little better than staring at the ceiling aimlessly.

He glances over, and look back down at his lap. His fingers fidget with each other.]