[a hand raises to his chest, as if to try and push him away again, but Nikkari doesn't have much energy. and being held, he has even less, part of his willpower drained at how much he longs for the contact. to be wrapped up entire, as if that would make this cease to be. he yearns for this presence, as much as he tries to run from it.
just the thought aches in a deep way, something gouged out and only the phantom memory remaining. his breaths, while ragged, aren't coughs for the moment. until he can force himself to speak again.]
I'm not...changing my mind. I can't be cured.
[his voice is soft, raw from the choking, from petals torn from his chest.]
Don't...look at me like this. [he tries, when he coughs again, to turn his head so he's not coughing into the fabric of Ishikirimaru's clothing, catching another breath around the camellia petals.] Let me go.
[there is nothing to be done. lay him down, speak the rites for the dead, and let him depart. maybe he deserves this lonely death, because of who he struck down. this might be karma at long last, come to him.]
no subject
just the thought aches in a deep way, something gouged out and only the phantom memory remaining. his breaths, while ragged, aren't coughs for the moment. until he can force himself to speak again.]
I'm not...changing my mind. I can't be cured.
[his voice is soft, raw from the choking, from petals torn from his chest.]
Don't...look at me like this. [he tries, when he coughs again, to turn his head so he's not coughing into the fabric of Ishikirimaru's clothing, catching another breath around the camellia petals.] Let me go.
[there is nothing to be done. lay him down, speak the rites for the dead, and let him depart. maybe he deserves this lonely death, because of who he struck down. this might be karma at long last, come to him.]